Friday, September 9, 2011

Where Were You?



Given that it's the tenth anniversary of 9-11, I am joining the rest of the media in memorializing the events.  I wanted to go back to the day it occurred and discuss my experience.  Tomorrow, I will go into some experiences of those close to us, people that I did not know until years after the fact.

I was driving to school the morning of September 11, it was time for one of my classes in the business school of my university, and I knew I wanted to get there on time.  While driving, I was listening to the radio, and I did hear them say something about a plane hitting one of the World Trade Center towers, but I mistakenly assumed that it was a little commuter plane that somehow went off course and ran into the building.  Something minor.  It wasn't until later when I was hearing more people talk before classes that I began to realize that something major was happening.  There were "rumors" of a bombing at the Pentagon, and students were mentioning other terrible stories.  As you may remember, September 11 was a mass of confusion in the media for quite awhile until they were able to piece together exactly what happened that day.  It was unknown in the early hours exactly what had happened and why.



Having no idea of what else to do, I continued going about my day.  I attended all of my classes with a greater sense of looming dread.  Classes completed, I drove to my internship and proceeded to put in a day's (afternoon's) work.  The story of the attacks was starting to meld a little more and everyone was getting a better idea of the true nature of the event.  I was told that many of the employees at the company were sitting around tv's in the building but since I was new, and an intern, I just decided to stay at my desk to finish my work.  A sweet broker came in to see if I was okay and to find out how I was feeling.  Having not seen an image yet, I was fairly okay, just a little confused and shaken. I do not remember now if they decided to go ahead and send me home early or if I just arrived home after finishing my day.  What I do remember is that after getting home, I was able to turn on a television and watch with my family.  I lived at home during college to save money, and I think I was pretty grateful for it during this time.  I also remember greatly missing my friends (and boyfriend...no, not my husband) and wishing that they were there to join me, as well.  Finally being able to see the images was soul shaking.  It is one thing to live with an idea of what might be happening in your head, but to see exactly what occurred is something that no one could have imagined.  I sat in front of the television with tears streaming down my face.



That night, my parish hosted a prayer service and all I remember is standing there tightly holding my sister ( who is 4 1/2 years younger than me) and crying my eyes out.  Finally, a cathartic cry to let go of every last bit of stress and fear from the day.  I remember that it made me take everything into consideration and reanalyze my life's direction.  Ultimately, it led to the demise of my relationship with that boyfriend.  It led to my deepening faith.  I needed God so that I could know all was right with the world.  It led to my eventual decision to spend my days home with my future children.  In the grand scheme of things, it became more important to me to do what was right and to place a higher value on the people that were in my life.  For that matter, the terrorist attacks really helped to mold me into a better person.  I was twenty-one and that day made me grow up more quickly than I otherwise might have.  It also brought me to today, and I am never more grateful for my dear husband and children.  They are my light and they are my life.


My heart and prayers are with the citizens of New York and Washington D.C. today and this weekend, especially in light of the new terrorist intelligence.  I pray for peace and protection from Our Lord.  
May Christ keep everyone safe.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Hatred And The Beauty of the 9-11 Cross


I was listening to the Catholic Channel this morning- A Conversation with the Archbishop.  They did a poignant memorial for 9-11, during which, mention of the "9-11 cross" came up.  The priest interviewed told the story of being one of the first to see it in the weeks after it was found.  Out of curiosity, I Googled the cross and came up with the St. Peter 9-11 Cross website that gave the story of the man who found the cross.  What also came up in the search, surprised me.  There was a headline that stated that the American Atheists were challenging the display of the 9-11 Cross on grounds that it was unfair/prejudicial against other religions.  Seriously.

Let's discuss this. And let's not only remember that this cross was not forged out of some reclaimed beams following the recovery effort, but was literally found as is, during the search for victims.  We'll try to remember too, that this is meant only as a memorial, not a shrine.  This is not suddenly, Our Lady of the Americas shrine, or some other devotion to our faith.  This is a cross that brought great consolation and peace to the citizens of New York as they put the pieces of their life back together in the days following September 11, 2001.  (Or Sept. 13, when the cross was found.)  This is a cross that was found in the wreckage and determined to be a symbol of the people who perished in the terrorist attacks, and of those who survived and forged ahead to create a new identity.

This historical artifact is a beautiful testament to God's unfailing presence in our lives. It represents that much, and more.  Dr. Edward Sri, in A Biblical Walk Through the Mass,  stated that "...the cross, we are invoking God's protection for our lives.  In the sign of the cross, we ask Him to protect us from all harm and evil."  While Sri used this to explain the deep symbolism in the "sign of the cross", I feel that the 9-11 cross  itself (or any physical cross for that matter) also contains this rich meaning.  Likely, this extends to the serenity that it brought to those who were most deeply effected in 9-11.

It also was a symbol of strength and comfort for the New Yorkers who trudged on post-9-11.  Regardless of their religious affiliation, this cross came to represent the solidarity of the citizens in the aftermath.  If God can be found in the wreckage, then peace can come out of the experience.  We will prevail and we will be stronger on the other side.  That is the message of the 9-11 cross.  And I cannot help but wonder if the ultimate reason that this group is protesting lies not in the fact that it is "unfair to non-Christians" but more that fact that deep-down, they recognize the vast power of The Cross and fear its effects.



Wednesday, September 7, 2011

God's Great Bounty

We met my dad at a farmer's market in town today.  There were such beautiful displays, that I couldn't help myself.  I wanted to take more, but I didn't want to be the crazy lady taking pictures and not really buying.  Though, I did get some great potatoes to bring home and add to some heirloom tomatoes, flowers, figs and watermelon that I'd purchased previously.  Some are a little blown out.  Bear with me.  I'm still learning with my new camera.  (And hope to get photoshop one of these days.)

Beautiful squash but blown-out.  The hazards of taking a picture with sunglasses on.  Lesson learned.

I'm so bummed.  This just doesn't capture the beauty of this picture thanks to the blow-out.

Pretty sure that the vendor thought I was a little nuts, but I loved her little chalkboard signs and the  gorgeous produce on her table.  I was very tempted to take a shot of her multi-color peppers but didn't want to push my luck.  I look forward to eating my potatoes, which you could see if the picture was darker.  But I digress....and dwell.

My son decided to dismantle the stack in the back soon after I took this.  It consisted of me running like mad to put it all back together- without knocking the camera around.





Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Bonus post!!!!!


You may have noticed that I tend to use the exclamation point often.  All I can tell you is that I'm working on it. And, I come by it honestly.

I've always thought the the exclamation point looked so cheerful, as though it were just a way of smiling at the end of your sentence (pre-emoticon).  It looked to me like a great way to show enthusiasm and to express how much I enjoy life.  And apparently I have felt this way for a long time.  A couple of years back, I ran into my student teacher from second grade.  This in itself isn't so surprising, as she worked in the same school I attended , and my mother worked there, as well.  However, she came up to me to mention that in the process of going through some old papers, she came across a page that I had turned in to her during class one day.  Signed in the upper corner on the Name line was:

Melanie Ascota!*


*Name changed to protect the innocent!  heehee

Throwing It All Off!



How I dream my house might look *someday*!

I am finally getting a chance to get some organizing done, and I'm hitting it full force!  To understand how big this is for me, you need to understand my life and what it has been like for the past few years:


  • Dec. 2005- Pregnant, then miscarry in January 2006
  • June 2006- Pregnant and miscarry in August of 2006
  • August-December 2006- Healing and trying to get back on track
  • March 2007- Find out I am pregnant again
  • November 2007- Dear Son born!
  • March 2008- Put house on market
  • July 2008-Move
  • July 2008- October 2009- Start to get things organized and in place
  • October 2009- Pregnant and miscarry December 2009
  • March 2010- Pregnant again
  • November 2010- Dear Daughter born!
  • August 2011- Hernia surgery
  • September 2011- Healing

I tell you this so that you can see how momentous it feels to me to finally start getting the house in order again. It kind of fell to pieces after October 2009, and truly, I can't even claim that we were getting there before then. Just as we were starting to put everything away, something else would  come up.  My husband had been going to grad school ever since we have been married, and finally graduated last December.  He also travels. A LOT.  This means that there was quite a bit on me, and little time to do it with a small child(ren).  Things pretty much kept getting moved around.  They'd go to the office, then the basement, then a closet.  We would put aside items for charity donations, but never get a chance to itemize. So, they would sit there, waiting for us to do something.  I found just piles, every time I turned around, another bag would jump out at me.

Finally, I am getting a chance to clear out some clutter.  I feel like it is insane how much we have right now- so much that can go to charity, but we haven't had a chance to do so.  My hope is that after itemizing everything today, we can deliver it all later this week.  It will be a load off to get rid of the STUFF! Do you have an issue like this?  I feel so blessed, I just think we amass things that our family has outgrown, and things that people give us that really do not get used, so quickly!  We don't live in "America's Messiest House," by any means, but I really feel like we could have a better system.  A better way to keep our things organized and to care for them. Now, I just need to determine how to weed some of those extras out.

This weekend, I focused on paperwork and random items that we falling by the wayside upstairs.  I have yet to come up with the perfect system that will work for my whole family...or more importantly, my husband and myself.  But, I will keep trying.  One of these days, it will all click, and then perhaps we will finally run like a well-oiled machine.  Although, is that even possible in a home with small children?  I'll just settle for good enough, I guess! :)

This is a start, though.  We are making progress!

((My hope is that I can report back to you in a few weeks with even more progress on my organization, but baby steps!))

Friday, September 2, 2011

Mmmm....!

Taken from Google images

I've mentioned before my love of "crepes" and today I created some delicious faux crepes, as a snack.  Yum!  I thought I would share them here because they are easy and taste so great!

All you need are a few ingredients.  I have two versions...what can I say, I was hungry!  Ha.

Ginger Peach "Crepe"

  • 1/2 cup Frozen peaches (Organic is best, in my humble opinion.  365 organic!)
  • 1 tsp. salted butter (My FAV is Kerrygold Spreadable.  Butter from grass-fed cows!  Is there anything better?)
  • Whole wheat tortilla (I love either Whole Foods' or Trader Joe's whole wheat tortillas.  No trans fats.)
  • 1/2 tsp. sugar
  • Sprinkle of ground ginger
Precook the peaches for about 3 minutes in the microwave.  While the peaches cook, spread the tortillas with butter, then sprinkle with sugar and ginger.  Put peaches, minus the accumulated juice on the tortilla.  Microwave for 30 seconds.  Remove and fold into quarters.  Enjoy!!!! Oh, and it will be messy, but so worth it!

Cinnamon "Toast" "crepe"  (Could there be more quotes in a title?)
  • Whole wheat tortilla
  • 1 tsp. butter 
  • 1/2 tsp. sugar
  • Sprinkle of cinnamon
Spread tortilla with butter, and sprinkle with sugar and cinnamon.  Microwave for 30 seconds, fold and try not to spill the melted butter on yourself while you scarf it down. 

Hope you enjoy these recipes.  I sure did!  (Can't wait to share them with the napping kiddos someday.)

By the way, I enjoy mine with hot tea.  I love the stuff and my favorite is Republic of China either Red Tea or Raw Bush Tea, different flavors! :)

Thursday, September 1, 2011

First Day of Preschool: Mommy Fail


Today was my son's first day of preschool!  *tear* It's hard to believe that he is that big already.  It was also a bit of a comedy of errors today.  The route I used to take to drop him off at Parent's Day Out (same building) was closed, unbeknownst to me.  So our decent time frame was killed by the detour.  We got a couple of great pictures and proceeded to his classroom, where the teacher was so intent on getting me to sign the pickup/dropoff form that I didn't get to hug him goodbye.  Well, he's used to the "school" building already, so he was ready to get going and didn't seem too upset.  I was probably more upset that I didn't get to give a hug on his very first day.

My daughter and I headed off to a nearby mall to kill time until pickup.  The school is far enough away that I don't feel like I can head home and have time to accomplish anything.  After spending some time together, I decided to look up the website to double check on pick up times.  I had two times stuck in my head and could not figure out which one was correct.  I check the website, and although it said Preschool-4s, I assumed times would be similar.  Big mistake!  Never assume...you know the rest.  So, the website said 11:25 and while 11:15 was also in my head, I just assumed that I had it right.  I pick up some cupcakes as a first day treat for his teachers and head to pick him up.

"Huh!  The parking lot looks kind of sparse! Surely more parents should be picking up!?!"  I unload my daughter, head in, and turning the corner, walk smack into my son and his teacher.  Uh, yeah.  Pickup was 11:15.  He looks concerned but runs past me because they had been headed to look at the fish tank.  After a quick apologetic talk with my teacher, I head back to see my son.  He is staring at the fish tank, but looks seriously deflated.  MOMMY FAIL!  I know it isnt' the end of the world, I just don't want his first day of school, ever to have such a negative memory.  I had all kinds of great ideas to make it special.  I'd gotten him a treat of a cookie at the bakery, and also some watercolor pencils to use at home. I was in a great mood and planning to take him out to lunch.  But, for quite awhile, a big fat cloud hung over us.  I tried talking to him but he was just upset.  He didn't want to tell me about his day.

We did lunch anyway, and slowly I was able to pry out a few different details.  Mostly, he didn't want to share.  It was not how I'd imagined: Showing up and giving him a huge hug, letting him give his teachers their treats, taking him to lunch while he bubbled over with stories for me.  Well, I do have big plans for dinner.  I'm making his favorite: spaghetti, and then he will get his special treat to celebrate.  Hopefully, it will make up for it all, and if not, I guess there is always next Tuesday.  I will be on time on both sides of the school day this time.  I've learned my lesson!